I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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