there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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