I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
