Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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