We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
