did you get engaged???
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize