she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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