Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
handjob tips. give me some.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
