eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
