Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize