I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
