THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
