Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize