Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
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NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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