are you still at the devil's house?
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
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