Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
