we have pet lesbian snakes
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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