I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize