I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Randomize
