atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
