Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

yo i have your phone

(202): View more from Washington, DC

... oh so you probably won't get this message

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(202): yo i have your phone (202):... oh so you probably won't get this message http://tfl.nu/0ifv

Replies (14) Good night (2112) Bad night (978)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Dude, you need to talk to your mom

(724): View more from Pennsylvania

wtf?

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you

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(412): Dude, you need to talk to your mom (724): wtf? (412): She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you http://tfl.nu/71sh

Replies (32) Good night (696) Bad night (4565)
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(804): View more from Virginia

Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.

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(804): Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift. http://tfl.nu/sb1j

Replies (17) Good night (682) Bad night (2286)
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(818): View more from California

So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?

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(818): So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God? http://tfl.nu/oozc

Replies (91) Good night (5026) Bad night (785)
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(847): View more from Illinois

I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.

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(847): I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore. http://tfl.nu/qnk6

Replies (32) Good night (988) Bad night (4781)
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(469): View more from Texas

Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.

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(469): Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me. http://tfl.nu/jccz

Replies (26) Good night (921) Bad night (3960)
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(506): View more from New Brunswick

She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable

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(506): She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable http://tfl.nu/lnzm

Replies (8) Good night (1246) Bad night (3290)
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(210): View more from Texas

Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country

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(210): Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country http://tfl.nu/te1e

Replies (9) Good night (4274) Bad night (1116)
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(816): View more from Missouri

i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.

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(816): i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else. http://tfl.nu/65tn

Replies (1) Good night (1046) Bad night (2837)
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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today

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(321): Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today http://tfl.nu/s99h

Replies (2) Good night (2175) Bad night (883)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN

(1-412): View more from Pennsylvania

how did i know this would happen?

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(412): I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN (1-412): how did i know this would happen? http://tfl.nu/2nli

Replies (8) Good night (1905) Bad night (1213)
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(303): View more from Colorado

Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group

(1-303): View more from Colorado

But you wear shame so well

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(303): Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group (1-303): But you wear shame so well http://tfl.nu/l3oh

Replies (4) Good night (2748) Bad night (606)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...

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(215): The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on (267): It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID... http://tfl.nu/2nuu

Replies (9) Good night (3118) Bad night (624)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.

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(+44): Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me. http://tfl.nu/v4al

Replies (3) Good night (1084) Bad night (370)
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(360): View more from Washington

You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.

(1-360): View more from Washington

I'm puking in a turkey pan....

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(360): You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal. (1-360): I'm puking in a turkey pan.... http://tfl.nu/y4jv

Replies (6) Good night (1096) Bad night (400)

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