i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
