i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
