i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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