Don't you send me to vm
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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