so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
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Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
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Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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