if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people are starting to question the shark bite story
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
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