I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I think im going to throw up on grandma
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?