this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
