She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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