My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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