last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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