He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize