just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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