if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I want a musical about memes.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
