TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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