You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
worst night to have a conscience
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
