just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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