Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize