Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
