i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize