Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
she smelled like a LAN party
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Randomize
