yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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