Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
