And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
