At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
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That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
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Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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