I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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