So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
