I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
