i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
